I have completed 25 years and according to Indian society, I should get married now. In India, society decides the age of your marriage. You don’t have any right to choose the right time of your own marriage. Whether you are ready or not when society says this is the time to get married then you should get married. If you don’t marry in the time period decided by society then the society won’t accept you. And after that time period you will automatically become a rebel. When that time period begins, the society starts pressurising you in their own ways. I am elder son in the family. Thus my window of getting married began when I completed 24 years and it will probably end when I will complete 27 years.
“Ab Tera number hai.”, “Tere liye ladki dekhein?”, “Humari pasand ki ladki se shadhi karega na?” People started nagging me by saying such things as soon as I completed 24 years of my life. At that time, I was not earning enough. Hence, at that time I used dodge such things by saying “I am not earning enough at the moment.”, “Arre! Yeh sab toh chalta rahega. Shadhi toh karle.” Some incorrigible people used to counter my reply in this way. In the beginning, I ignored them but as the time passed they started getting on nerves. In India some people think a person should only aim to get married and have kids. According to Indian society, it is okay if a person don’t achieve anything in life but if one is not married then he/she has no right to live a normal life. People who are not married here are ignored or are not greeted and treated properly.
Compared to Indian culture, Western culture is totally opposite. In western culture, when a child become an adult, he/she is left on his/her own devices. Society don’t make rules there. Society don’t tell them when to marry & whom. In western culture, guys and girls marry when they are well settled and are ready to get married. In western culture when someone’s kid is getting married then that one would be married to or dating third or fourth man/woman in his life. That’s the normal life there. India is trying to adopt that culture desperately. In that desperation, we are loosing the charm of Indian culture. And our society plays a big role in it. In the desperation of adopting the western culture, we are stuck between the two cultures.
In the time when guys and girls of my generation don’t mind in making out with their cousins. In the time when partners cheat each other with mutual understanding, I prefer to be one woman man. I believe in soul mate kind of love. I believe in Indian culture. Indian culture is much better than western culture. I don’t think we need to adopt western culture. There is no need to destroy the concepts of loyalty, family belonging, togetherness and fidelity. All we need is a change in our society. And if we need to bring change in the society then We need to bring change in ourselves. Be the change you want to see in the world. Just filter out the old mentality and make way for the new one.
The more you adopt the western culture, The lesser fidelity you should expect in a relationship.
First episode of marriage and the society comes to an end. From the next episode we will see how society behaves when it comes to marriage and what changes we need in it .